Saturday Night Live recently aired a sketch that wasn’t technically a standard Saturday Night Live sketch. It was one of those pre-recorded bits that looks more like Key & Peele, but let’s not split hairs. The premise is a product commercial: “Mean Scary Girlfriend,” a woman who comes preloaded with catchphrases like “No, go change” and “Call a car, we’re leaving.” She even ships with an accessory, Dog Who Hates You.
At first glance, you might ask who this is for. Nobody in their right mind wants a Mean Scary Girlfriend. The sweet, agreeable girl from the top of the sketch seems like the better deal.
But that’s because you and I are not the audience.
The audience is the modern liberal man, and the sketch works because there’s a kernel of truth buried in it. The opening scene is a guy asking his girlfriend what to eat, what to wear, and whether he should get a haircut, and every answer is “whatever you want.” He’s exhausted by it. Why? Because he doesn’t want to make decisions.
That’s the whole sketch, and honestly the whole problem with limo wristed lib men. Leadership requires deciding, and sometimes the decisions are hard. A man who avoids them doesn’t stop needing them made. He just outsources the job. Hence the Mean Scary Girlfriend: a decision-making department with a bad attitude, and liberal “men” are the ones who signed up for it.
Outsourcing is fine when the contractor is competent. Here’s what the sketch accidentally admits: the contractor has terrible judgment. Everything she loves is suspect, and everything she despises is probably fine.
Case in point is the sketch’s big laugh line, where she tells her boyfriend his haircut makes him look like a Turning Point USA campus recruiter. In a sketch built to mock him, that’s the compliment. The haircut looks great. A clean-cut young man with a purpose is what she’s supposed to be dating, and the sketch treats him as the punchline. Sorry he doesn’t have a greasy green rat tail.
First, the left’s idea of a dream girlfriend and its idea of a nightmare are both pointed at the wrong target. Second, and this is the best part, the people who produce this stuff clearly can’t stop thinking about us. We don’t rent space in their heads. We have squatter’s rights in a California style Airbnb..
So, to the writers, and to Dakota Johnson (pictured above): thank you for the shout-out. We appreciate the free publicity. Our campus recruiters will be sending a fruit basket.
Get more of Jobob’s perspective on today’s most important stories on Turning Point Tonight, which airs Monday through Friday evenings on Real America’s Voice.
